Sunday, 18 March 2018

KNOW YOUR WORTH! (How Do You Know Your Worth?)

Upon talking with a friend recently, I could not help but to make this topic my next blog post. 

It's so surreal that there are actually women out there who are lost, unsure of what their worth really is. The fact that she is a friend and I value my friends, I felt that it was only respectful and the right thing to do to listen, evaluate, be non-judgmental and give her my best honest advice.

While she voiced her story to me, I said to her "Know your worth." Lost and saddened she was, she hit me back with the question "How do I know my worth?" 
I smiled after receiving her question. A smile of sympathy, a smile of empathy. I told her to ask herself; How do I see myself as a person? and How do I expect a man or someone else to see me as that said person? 

The thing is, she is not the only one who is struggling with knowing her worth. Both men and women is very likely to come across this phase in life where they are left to question their own values. However, I believe this is more common among us women. 

"We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves."

Struggling to find your worth can be based on a few things like:

•Past experiences you've had with someone you dated or possible a friend/family member.
•Your outlook on yourself as a person •CONFIDENCE. 

If you can relate to any of those pointers (especially your confidence level) then it's no surprise you are having difficulties with knowing and accepting your worth. Look at yourself in the mirror, take a moment to pause, breathe calmly and think.  
“As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster. You have to be whole and complete in yourself. No one can give you that. You have to know who you are - what others say is irrelevant.”

Try to find all the qualities in yourself, accept them and embrace them. Learn to love yourself. Self love is sufficient. If you don't love yourself, no one else will. If you don't accept yourself for who you are inside and out, no one else will. 

So, do you know your worth?

In a nutshell, my advice to you is; if you are struggling with this it’s best to start by doing some self evaluation. Find all the good things in you; quality over quantity. Love yourself. Keep your chin up. Smile. 

And if you are in a relationship, once you embrace all these pointers, your worth will become so clear to your partner. He/she will respect you and know where you stand as a person. 

-Dedicated to a friend ❤️

Monday, 5 March 2018

Should Your Relationship Be Kept Private And Off Social Media? | VIEWS

relationships and social media

Almost everyone shares a different view of privacy in relationships. Still the question looms over people worldwide; should a relationship be kept private or be publicized? How bad can either extreme be?

Speaking from personal experience it is safe to say that a more private relationship has less outside influence and unsolicited opinions. In other words, it is drama and “I heard that…” free! But to what extent is  privacy good? Would you say you should avoid  being seen with your partner publicly or just not be seen palavering everywhere on social media? Well quite frankly, it’s all up to you.

Let’s be real, as long as it’s a genuine relationship and you are one who is active on social media, from time to time you may get that urge to ”show off” a little. Posting about your relationship is not always a bad thing, it varies from relationship to relationship and depends greatly on how you do it.

But here comes the disclaimer!! You  have no idea how many people are out there lurking and feeding off your life and injecting all kinds of negative energies into your relationship. Some people may be envious of you or just hate the nature of the relationship and the happiness you experience because of and with each other. Granted, there are many people who are cheering you on but it would be naïve to think that your relationship only has friends and no foes. This is why caution should always be exercised.

As you may well know, my relationship isn’t 100% private, however, personal information and things that need to stay off the media are definitely kept confidential (between my partner and myself). I know many of you can see (if you are a following my Instagram, Snapchat or Facebook) that the things I post on my social media with Alex and I are sole photos with simple captions (nothing to describe the status of our relationship) and only comical videos of Alex when he attempts to sing Jamaican songs or speak the lovely creole.

So do I think personal information regarding your love life should be kept off the internet? YES
Do I think you should keep your relationship 100% private including who you are dating off the internet? THE CHOICE IS YOURS

Everyone’s relationship belongs to them and no one else. Couples are entitled to their own opinion as to the degree of publicity or privacy they chose to expose their union. Just bear in mind that there are consequences to both extremes and many ramifications when a couple decides to share every aspect of their relationship on social media;  especially if your relationship happens to have a short shelf life. Be sure that you know the person you are dating and his/her intentions before being too public about him or her.

If you need a little guide to know if your relationship is just right for you, check out 8 Ways You Know He Is The One.


Tuesday, 27 February 2018


If you ask someone at random to list the things they’d love to do around their partner you’d probably hear a few “uhmmm”s and “wellll..”s before they could even begin to answer. Ask those same people about some things they feel they’d never want to do and you’ll find a million answers flying out of nowhere. It’s weird how we can think about all the awkward things we wouldn’t do in a relationship. But the more you think about these ”awkward” things the more you realize that at some point or another they are bound to happen. Thankfully for me, most of these things were a breeze! I hardly ever felt any stiffness when I wanted to just be myself around my partner.

But “awkward things”, what am I even talking about?

  • Passing Gas
I think this might head the list of things people might be apprehensive about in a relationship, especially if it is new. But let me tell you, once you have settled in your partner’s company you probably won’t even notice the first time you farted. Passing gas, is only natural. Don’t see it as an embarrassment, you’re body is just doing it’s job. In fact, your partner might become concerned about your health if you were never able to relieve yourself in this way.

  • Taking A Pee… Outside!
I don’t think it will be that hard taking a pee in the bathroom infront of your boyfriend and I’ll tell you why I said boyfriend instead of “partner”. As it regards to peeing outside of a bathroom, it has always been natural for a guy to just stand and pee anywhere outside. Imagine you’re on a night out with your boyfriend and while strolling with him outside there comes a strong urge too pee and the options are:
       a) stoop next to a shrub and empty your bladder or
       b) wait until it becomes unbearable and wet yourself.
I don’t think too many of you would choose option b. Peeing outside can be really embarrassing for some girls. It’s not always easy to do especially if you’re just getting to know him. There are ways of handling this if you aren’t yet comfortable. He doesn’t necessarily have to be standing over you while you pee. He can be a couple metres away while you handle your female business. When you do reach that point of comfort in your relationship you could possibly be taking pees outside… together!

  • Number 2
Ayiyyiy! Why is it that most times it’s us  women who can have insecurites about doing the natural stuff when our boyfriend/husband is around? Men, on the other hand, can easily do the number 2  even on the first date but for us women, our partner could possibly never even know of us having the urge to poop, even more so seeing us go! Women generally like to give off a classy aura especially when it comes on to being around their partner. I  didn’t even expect myself to do a number 2 even infront of Alex but when two people are in the same household these things are only natural and expected. We try to make it funny sometimes, especially when one person is going at it for two long. We either ask if the other person needs help or jokingly bring a pair of scissors just in case they ran into any difficulty.

  • Snoring
If you’re a snorer it’s okay! I didn’t even know I was able to snore until Alex recorded me one day when we were in Jamaica. It was kind of an embarrassing but funny experience. But remember we have no control over these things while we are asleep. If you are afraid of snoring and feel like it may  be a problem for a long term relationship you can always do your research on how to fix it or possibly seek medical advice. As for those who may only be occasional snorers, my advice is to embrace it and laugh about it.

  • Burping
This is also a very touchy subject. You  may want to be a little respectful towards your partner and exercise some restraint depending on the setting. For example, at a restaurant; you wouldn’t want to be burping too loudly in his company as this is not proper etiquette.  If it’s an easy going day at home there is no need to feel afraid to pass a little trapped air from the stomach. Just always remember to at least say excuse me or show a little grace no matter the setting.

  • Morning Breath
To finish off strong, one awkward thing is – drumroll please – morning breath! Your own morning breath can even attempt to take you out like a sniper. So imagine waking up next to your partner and being paralyzed by the fear of killing him or her as soon as they wake. Good oral hygiene is sufficient. As long as you take care of your mouth, morning breath won’t be too aggressive. Morning breath will still exist even when you have excellent oral hygiene but the degree of the smell will be less. There is no sure way of getting rid of morning breath completely so why not try to embrace this as well? In the long run neither you nor your partner will pay attention to this and you’ll even be having stinky face to face conversations in the mornings!

For a happy relationship to happen we need to include all the cool, uncool, gross and natural things that exist. This includes (but is not limited to) all these things I’ve mentioned. Keep an open mind and remember no human being is perfect!

See You On My Next Post!

Tuesday, 20 February 2018


How can you know if your partner is the one? Is it the way he talks to you on a daily basis? Is it the respect that he shows you? Or maybe the way he holds your hand when you walk?
Whatever it is, only you can know when it all feels right.
The fact is that not everyone feels connected to their partner in the same way after the same amounts of time. For some it takes months, years or possibly a day! This absence of a strict formula sheet for love makes even Cupid question his own existence.

Just don’t think you’re alone, there are numerous girls out there who still havent found the answer for whether or not their boyfriend is right for them.
Here are some pointers to reassure you when all those pesky doubts arise!

That Natural Spark- Keep your eyes peeled for this as it’s probably the most important thing when contemplating your feelings toward another person. He  reminds you of all your favourite things and a  light sparks up your soul and warms your heart at the mention of his name.

Attention! - There is nearly nothing better than getting his attention without having to beg for it. If your boyfriend gives you the minimal amount of attention and it feels like you have to be prying it from his hands, something could be wrong. You might want to pay closer attention to this but avoid being sneaky, invasive or disrespectful because this can easily backfire.

He Speaks The Truth- Honesty is invaluable in a relationship. Some men are a bit rougher around the edges than others which may sometimes make them appear to be too  blunt. However, it is always good to take the truth for what it is as opposed to focusing on the mode of delivery rather than the message itself. One good way to go about this if your beau is more on the frank side is to avoid asking some questions until you are prepared to receive the answer. Just remember he is honest because he cares about you.

Family/Friends – At some point in a serious relationship you will have to meet his family and friends. Does he keep rescheduling everytime you both made plans to meet his family? Or probably always finds excuses when you want to hang with him and his friends. Then you might want to pull out your magnifying glass. This is indication of whether or not he views your relationship as tempory, or if he is just not ready (probably if the relationship is fairly new). I believe guys like to wait a while more than girls before taking steps, one of those steps being mostly to meet the family. If you know the relationship is bit new just be patient. On the other hand, have you tried to let him meet your friends or family?

Respect – You don’t want to waste your time if you rarely see this from him. Bear in mind that respect should always be reciprocated, so ensure that you are being respectful as well. The way he speaks to you publicly or privately should be on the same acceptable level. We know people can sometimes put on a show in public to “one up” so to speak and make the world have the impression that they are a good person while behind closed doors it’s the total opposite. If your guy shows you the same level of respect both  indoors and outdoors then that’s a clear win!

He Checks In – If you have a boyfriend and your messages or call log is as dry as the Sahara Desert, then something could be wrong. Maybe he’s one of those persons who claim to be ”busy” 90% of the time. But there’s a word called ”priority” and if he doesn’t prioritize you then you could be wasting your time. Though if he constantly checks up on you to see how your day went, how you are doing, if you’ve ate, then you probably should hold on to his hand a little tighter.

Future – Not many things can be more comforting than when you listen to him making his future plans and you are a part of them. You begin to feel secure and not like your time is being wasted on something that’s only transient. If a man sees you in his future then you have stepped foot in the right place. As long as he is an honest man and has always been plain and open to you about things then you don’t need to overthink the relationship.

Helping Out – He can help out in various ways; mentally, physically or emotionally. From time to time us  girls definitely need this type of support system from our partner no matter how ”independent” one can claim to be. It’s only natural to require a little help form your boyfriend from time to time. It doesn’t  have to be financially but a little emotional and physical support might be all you need and will definitely go a long way. If your boyfriend is a supportive person and is always ready to listen then you have got yourself a gold star.

Today I am ending  on this note; it is good to know that it takes two to make a couple. So expecting all these things would be void if you don’t give or show them in return. He could possibly be wondering if you are also  the one and be discreetly observing you with all these pointers. Don’t be selfish and also try to be THE ONE.

Thursday, 15 February 2018

Long Distance Relationship And 7 Ways How I Handle It

As for who knows me personally, you are probably aware of the fact that I am in a long distance relationship. So instead of speaking on general terms on this topic, I will speak on a personal term instead.

Before Alex and I relationship sky rocketed to great things, I never forget the day when we met and we exchanged our contacts. I said to him "Don't become a stranger" and he promised he would stay in touch.

I felt straight away like "pssh yeah right, as soon as you get on that plane you won't even remember I exist" while there was still a part of me that hoped he was telling in the truth.

In a nutshell, he kept his promised.

Believe it or not, from the day Alex went home and messaged me we spoke literally every day! If any day had passed it wouldn't have been more than one day for five times. I start on this note because I will be listing seven main ways (though there are more) on how we maintain such strong relationship while being 8,585 km apart with communication being number one.


You probably have gotten the idea from my introduction. For Alex and I, communication is very very important. We breathe communication and we live communication (hope you got the hang of that). But this is not only valuable when we are apart. Communication play a daily role in our lives even when we are under the same roof. When we have a fuss and I don't feel like speaking, Alex never cease to remind me of when I first told him what I value most in a relationship, communication being one of them. This resolve issues, make our plans go smoother and help us to understand and know each other better.


Even in the time of being just pals, Alex and I have always been honest with each other about our feelings. There was a part in time when we didn't see a relationship happening in the near future but Alex would always tell me how much he values me as a friend. Of course it was the same for me. I cared about him and I always felt okay to be open and honest with him. Honesty came more into play when we became an actual couple. A relationship needs honesty in order to survive not to mention when you are miles apart.


As like the first two mentioned above with all being of importance, a relationship needs trust. Imagine a relationship as a plant and trust as water. Without water the plant will not grow, neither will a relationship without trust itself. Because of our honesty from the start as friends, there was no need for us not to trust each other. When we became a couple, we gave each other even more reasons to build trust. For example, meeting all the persons we've ever spoke about that is in our circle, not going to the bathroom or outside and speaking quietly when receiving a call etc. People build trust in different ways but for Alex and I, the trust was already being built when we have been open to each other from the start.


This falls very important for us. We always plan the times or the next time when we will  see each other. My heart always feel like it's falling in a pit when we have to say goodbye at the airport. Neither of us like to being apart from each other for too long. We always plan and schedule the date(s) that we'll be seeing each other so we both don't have to be home longing too see each other in hopes. If you are in a long distance relationship like me I recommend doing this with your partner also.


I always make sure I am readily available to him whether the situation is good or bad, especially while on a distance. This is the reassurance medicine for us. It helps us to never lose hope that we will always be there for each other even when it is over the phone. It builds solidity between us.


A long distance relationship can't rely on sole text messaging. Let me tell you, even in the time of being just friends, Alex and I would talk on the phone for HOURS! Yes, hours. My mom would always say "where do you two find things to talk about that much." And now that we are dating it's basically like a whole day instead. I know I am not the only one who is on a long distance relationship that can relate to this. (If you can relate leave a comment of how many hours you talk to your partner on the phone, you can keep your identity unknown)


Not only are we lovers or partners in crime (Bonnie & Clyde) but Alex is also my best friend! He means so much to me and I can talk to him just as if I would talk to my girlfriends. And it is the same from his side. I can tell him about my bad hair days or how annoying my periods can be and he can talk to me about his bicycle or other male things. There are days when it's almost like we've forgotten that we are dating because of the best friend bond that we share. And I believe some of the best relationships start off as being best friends with my very own being an example.

A Conclusion For You

I hope you can relate to how I handle my long distance relationship and if your long distance relationship is going well, I wish that it will continue to be like that until destiny have you both together. If you're in long distance relationship and it has its complications, don't give up just yet. Every relationship has it own complications and it can be even more when you are miles apart. Always remember issues will not be solved without communicating with each other. 

See you on my next post! 💗

Monday, 12 February 2018

Valentine's Day Tips For Him.

It's that time of the year again when couples look toward to the 14th of February. The day or red roses, chocolates, teddy bears and love ❤️

If you are one of those girls who like Valentine's Day as much as me, then you probably should check this out.

As for my personal plans this year, I am really just looking forward to a cozy day with my partner. I have already told him no gifts and I held no expectations for any, especially when he make most of my days feel like Valentine's Day.

Now for you my dearest ladies, here are some Valentines Day tip for your love:

1. The Perfect Date.
Thinking of the perfect date can be so complex than it actually is. As long as you know your partner well enough this should be somewhat of an easy fix. Try asking yourself questions like, what does he like? What does he dislike? What have he been talking about the most these past months? What does he like to do? Etc. With all these questions you can ask yourself, eventually you will come up with a great date idea!

2. The Perfect Gift.
We thought the perfect date was challenging but what about the perfect gift? Geez! How hard can this be sometimes! But the same thought as above may apply to the gif. Knowing your partner enough can help you to figure it out. Know his likes and dislikes. Most importantly you don't want to shop him something that he doesn't need or has any use for. Try to think a little out of the box. Watches and things like that are a little out dated if you ask me and I believe it is for men also. Most often that's what they think girls will shop them so that takes away the element of surprise from the gift.

3. Make A Splendid Dinner
Sometimes the pocket can be a little budgeted but you still want to make this day special. Making a fantastic dinner is one way to show and give some valentine atmosphere to your partner. Cook his favorite meal why don't you? And maybe add something a bit extra this time. Light up some candles, dim the lights, play some cozy low music in the background and let him enjoy his favorite meal you made while having a wonderful time together.

4. What To Wear On The Date
This is all your choice. It's a typical stigma that people should wear red or red and white on Valentine's Day but it is all up to your own preference. Depending on the type of date, then you might want to dress accordingly. With a simple example, if you will be watching Fifty Shades Freed then you might want to dress a bit chic or casual or semi-casual. Or if it's a dinner date at fancy restaurant then you're thinking more elegant, heels and that dashingly glorious red lipstick 😉 However, you will definitely know what goes best as to what date you'll be going on!

5. Take A Romantic Walk
You could add this as a part of the planned date or even do it separately. You get to know your partner a little more when you walk or stroll with him. Go out and have a romantic walk. Talk, smile, laugh, feel and embrace the moment!

6. Re-live Your First Date
This is something I would personally do. Why not try to bring your first date back to life? Maybe you two have memories from that special day that you can never forget or never stop talking about. Then this would be the perfect chance to re-live it once more. If your first date wasn't all that, then maybe somewhere down the line you shared a good one? Still, it is not a problem to re-live that one also.

7. Don't Expect Too Much.
The fact that you probably will be shopping your boyfriend a gift doesn't mean he necessarily will be shopping you one also. So you just might want to be a little reserved and humble on this day. Don't be regretful about getting him a gift if he didn't get you one or if your gift costs less than his. It is the thought that always counts. The fact that he is with you on Valentine's Day or even if he is miles away and still give you that Valentine's affection, that alone should give you some reassurance.

8. He Doesn't Like Valentine's Day
As disappointing as it may sound, it's no big deal. Everyone has their dislikes and is entitled to it and it is something you have to respect as his partner. There are ways in which you could work around it out of respect for him. Maybe you can give yourself a girl treat by doing a manicure or pedicure also *wink*

Since Fifty Shades Freed is trending I guess some of you will make this a Valentine's special and why not? Make this day spicy as much as you can! Just remember the champagne or wine and rose petals! ❤️

I wish you an early Happy Valentine's from me and mine to you and yours! Good luck with all!

Wednesday, 7 February 2018

About Me

Hey and welcome! 

 My name is Kemalto Nesbeth and I am delighted you have landed on my blog. I am 21 years old and born on the beautiful island of Jamaica. I enjoy reading, blogging and from time to time drawing. I consider myself as a humble person who values friendships, relationships and always trying to be attentive and respectful to the people around me.
 Here on my blog you will find personal and general articles relating to the topics of love, relationships and life. As a person who values love with all the good and bad that comes with it, I am happy I could have started this blog to reach out to friends, families and other people around the world to share my insight regarding these topics.
 I hope that you are one who will be able to relate to the articles that I write. I look forward to being consistent while bringing meaningful messages and articles across to you. Thank you for visiting and I look forward to you returning. 

One love ❤️

Tuesday, 6 February 2018

Working Too Much Can Affect Your Relationship!

Not only can working too much affect your relationship, it can also affect your life and your well being.

Are you that 9 to 5 person? Maybe one who works a 12 or 13 hour shift? Do you only see your partner when it's close to bedtime? Is it that you also may have difficulty seeing your partner on the weekends? Yes? Then you might want to stop for a minute, read a little more here and think.

When was the last time you got to share some quality time with your partner? If you have to think about this for more than a second, then chances are your relationship is likely to fall under. Good for you if you are one who knows how to balance both work and your relationship.

"I was one of those people who put too much emphasis on work and career and material possessions, and it took it's toll on all of my relationships, on my physical health, my emotional and mental health." -Tony Shalhoub

You happen to spend more time at work rather than more time with your partner not because work tells you to but because you chose to. You're so busy slaving one's self you don't realise the things that are happening around you or right in front of your eyes. People tend to not realise that you know more about your partner EVERYDAY and the little things he she had told you at the beginning of the relationship isn't enough for you to say "I know my partner." You could have been dating for 5 or 10 years believe me you still don't know your partner enough. Why do you think that even marriages that have been going on for a while on what seems to be a firm ground can come to an end? Of course, there will be many reasons possible to why it could end but in order to work things out with your partner, it is based on how well you know and communicate with him/her. And let me tell you, over working and spending less time with your partner does not in any way improve your communication level.

You are affecting your partner. Your partner could feel alone and wishing you were at home more often. Wishing you could wake up in the morning with him/her and not before. Maybe wanting to make a lovely dinner in the evening, light some candles and talk about one's inner self with you. But how will this happen if you're at work? 

If you do however are able to socialise with your partner on a free day, try not to talk about work too much when your life and the relationship is already 90% work. Talk about what really matters.

How many times have you both made plans but it had to be cancelled because you had to work? You might want to do this less if you don't wish for your relationship itself to be cancelled.

Restrain from bringing stress from work into the home. This is how arguments can flare up. You coming home grumpy from work because of your boss nagging you about a task deadline and your partner being stressed about you hardly being home. It happens and why wouldn't it? Try to free one's mind and not mix work with home. Moreover, don't mix work with your life.

Less work equals less stress and a better relationship! ♥

Monday, 5 February 2018

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