One of the very first
post I’ve written was about Long Distance Relationship and 7 Ways How I Handle It. In that post I mentioned ”communication” as
the first pointer as to how I keep my relationship alive while being on a
distance from my boyfriend and how much we both value it. A friend of mine messaged me roughly a week ago
with a link to a video where a guy speaks about challenges that can come during
a long distance relationship and ways that one could overcome these challenges.
It was really warm she thought of me when she saw the video but coincidentally,
my post about Long Distance Relationship and 7 Ways HowI Handle It basically have already listed all that was mentioned in the
guy’s video. I think once you’re in a long distance relationship that actually
funtions you’d already have the basic knowledge of what makes it work and what
could make others’ work.
But back to communication!
The video did give me some new insights
though as I now feel it necessary to expound a bit on the truth about
communication itself in a long distance relationship, more specifically, my
relationship (LDR).
Let me start by
saying that communication can be a challenge but doesnt need to be once you are
doing it right.
Communication on a distance
is never the easiest but there are definitely pros to it e.g., you learn about
your partner in a different way than you would if you both were in the same
room, it can be funny when you find it relatively easier to say things over the
phone that you would never say in person etc.
Communication can be challenging!- Speaking now from my own experiences, I have encountered
communication challenges with my boyfriend from time to time and it’s mostly due to
misunderstanding when TEXTING! I have also realised that the optimum way to communicate is by phone
calls or video calls. A person reads text messages in his/her own way so
sometimes the natural voice in which you sent the text could be misunderstood
which may lead to miscommunication or dispute. If you are to enter a fuss about
a text message which was interpreted incorrectly just stay calm and try to work
it out over a voicecall instead and explain the true nature of what was meant
in the text.
Finding the time to communicate?- As for me I always
have the time to communicate with my boyfriend. Even when I was at my previous
job where no phone was allowed I couldn’t help but to sneak my phone in just so
we could talk (sshhh… don't tell anyone). I had no choice! Especially when we
could be 6/7 hours on time difference and he could also be asleep or busy
studying/working during my ONE hour break for lunch.. hell naw! It all comes
down to priority and he is sure as hell my priority! Luckily, he is the type of
guy that I don’t need to question what and who he prioritizes because it’s all
so obvious in the way he handles his time i.e, I am always a part of his time.
Now that he currenty studies, apart from when he has exams coming up or
assignments, we could talk for hours and most often by voice calls
Voice calls? What about video calls?- Video calls also,
yes… certainly! Video calls is really effective especially when we haven’t seen
each other for a while or we’re missing each other like crazy. When we video
call it gives us a feeling as if we are physically together in the same room.
Personally, it relieves me from distance depression and helps me to sleep well
at night. All and all it depends on the time, place and mood for either one.
What happens when we don't know what to talk about?- This is what happens... we become silent or talk about the weirdest of things that make no sense whatsoever and have a good laugh! Haha... it's awkward I know! I'll explain a bit more about what I mean about being silent. When we don't know what topic to hit next we just live in the moment of listening or seeing what either of us is doing on the other end until another topic eventually spurs up. In a sense, it somewhat makes us feel as if we are in the same room together just by seeing/hearing the environment on the other side.
My Conclusion
Long Distance Relationships on a whole is never and will never be easy as it seems or as portrayed on the media. It comes with tears, sadness, happiness and most of all love in a diiferent way. In order to keep relationships like these alive communication is a must! If you are one that has problems communicating, my best advice to you is try to make a schedule if it is the fact that both of you have busy lives, whether with school or work. Also try to understand each other's differences. Not every couple will be lucky to talk 24 hours a day, every day of the week. Be patient and understanding that even while on a distance you both have to learn how to bloom as own individuals until that day comes when you both will be together permanently. The journey might be hard but it doesn't have to be forever.
If you have questions always feel free to shoot me a message.
Until next time friends!
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